“The LORD had said to Abram, “Leave your country, your people and your father’s household and go to the land I will show you.” Genesis 12:1

Leave everything you are comfortable with behind to go somewhere you’ve never been. To a place where you don’t know anyone. Leave your family that you love being around everyday. Leave the land you are so familiar with. The places you have grown to know and love and make memories in. Leave it all behind for Me.

Wow. Ok, God let’s build an ark. But leave? Leave everything that makes me happy and comfortable?

Wow, again. That just shows that I am searching for satisfaction in ALL the wrong places. But it feels good to be around my family. There is a comfort there. A trust. I could leave Randall with my family when I need to get things done. I look at Fort Lauderdale as so temporary, so I can deal with it. But I don’t truly want to deal with it. I want to thrive here. Richard just asked me the other day on our date (which was a blessing, Thank you God for my mom…please bless her for her servant heart) What do you want to accomplish while you are here? And I went off. I want to learn from the women here that I meet. I want to take this opportunity that I have to not be able to fill my time with family and best friends. To me, I think this is the time where God can build up in me a foundation in His word so that later I can speak with truth and knowledge. I want to eventually do women’s ministry so I need to build my spiritual tools up. What better way to do that than being here without anyone I know to distract me. I should be having time with my Abba Father EVERYDAY. I should be praying more. I should be getting involved in the church. I told Richard that I really want someone to disciple me. The best times in my walk with God have always been when I have had someone to bounce my questions and ideas off of. I need a mentor. So we are praying more. It is so precious to me. Last night, after Richard and I put Randall to bed we went upstairs to go to bed ourselves. I, of course, wanted to watch American Idol before I hit the sack and he proceeded to go to bed. I had just started the show and watched the first performer so I was now hooked and didn’t want to be distracted. Richard turned over after the first performer and said “Pause it!”. I said “ugh…why”. He said, “Let’s pray”. I was like ouch. That was a pierce to my distracted heart! It was the sweetest time of prayer. And to think, I almost got upset about having to pause my silly show.

This time with God in scripture has really opened my eyes to the thought of truly trusting Him with our future. We assume that in March of next year we are going to Orlando because that is the easiest, most convenient and comfortable route. What if God has something better? He always has. Everytime Richard and I have tried to plan our lives out it has gone the exact opposite way. That is God reminding us that He is in control and for us not to get ahead of ourselves with planning.

To be honest though, I am having the hardest time getting out of my house and meeting people and getting involved at church. I am not keeping it a high priority now that I think about it. I can’t even keep my house together, so getting out of the house feels wrong since I need to do so much at home. But then I get cabin fever and bitter towards Richard for having friends and a life outside our house. I am learning. Slowly but surely, I will get there. With God’s help.

Here is my sweet reminder for the day though:

“I will make you into a great nation and I will bless you” Genesis 12:2

The blessing. After all the difficulty and discomfort of leaving everything and everyone behind, you will be blessed. Keep your eye on the prize Crystal. The prize is Christ.

Published in: on March 21, 2010 at 8:48 am  Leave a Comment  

God Remembered

Noah walked with God. God asked him to build an ark. Noah obeyed God. God shut him in. God caused the flood. God remembered Noah. And finally, God blessed Noah.

So Crystal if you walk with God. He will ask you to build His “ark” for His glory. Your “ark” being your purpose. Your way to bring glory to God. God is the only one that can call you to this. He will be the only one who can give you the perfect directions for building your ministry, your godly home, and a glorifying marriage. Should you choose to obey, God will shut you into the ark of your purpose. He will seal you into His perfect will. Things will get rough and there will be resistance. There will be difficulty. You will get “cabin fever”. You will face personality conflicts with the people he locks you in the ark with. You will have to be a zoo keeper at times. You will deal with loss, death and wishing that they were in the ark with you. You will face opposition. Satan will try to tempt you to give up. But then, as God continues to allow the floodgates of heaven to pour out over your life and you float there waiting for deliverance, for an answer, for something…He will remember you. He will close the floodgates of heaven to allow your flood to recede and the Son will shine over your life. Drying up any tears, fears, worries and disappointments. Not only will He remember you. He will bless you. For obeying Him. In the process, He has built character up in you and you have learned to withstand resistance. You can now master sin. You can trust your God because He delivered you to where you are now. You are now in a trusting and loving relationship with your Creator. Your Abba Father.

He loves me.

Published in: on March 8, 2010 at 9:35 am  Comments (1)  

My Flood

Obeyed God. That’s what Noah did. He obeyed God. What “ark” would God ask me to build if I obeyed Him? How can I be righteous in this generation?

The one thing I’ve neglected to notice about the story of the flood up until now is in Genesis 7:16.

“The LORD shut him in”

This raises many questions and thoughts in my head. At first, my reaction is to look at my life and ask myself what I would do if the Lord shut me in. Have I been shut in before? Am I shut in now? Being shut in sounds pretty scary. I would be terrified if I were in that ark. But with character like Noah had, I would have complete faith in my God. That’s what he had. He trusted God so much he built an ark exactly how God asked and obeyed His every command. What ark is God waiting to ask me to build?

I want to build a women’s ministry. I want women to feel like beloved daughters and bride’s of their God and Christ. But what does God want for me? I want to move to Orlando and be with my family when Richard is done with his first two years of med school. I want a house on a lake with canopy trees leading up to it. I want a house full of children. But what I want doesn’t matter. It is such a leap of faith for me to say I only want what God wants for His glory and for myself. I think I even said that I wanted what God wants in a previous post. But when I sit here and list all the things that I want and think about none of those things being in God’s plan for me, I hesitate to trust Him. Again. I hesitate to let Him have all my dreams and desires. But I hear Him saying right now:

Crystal, delight yourself in me and I will give you the desires of your heart. (Psalm 37:4)

Yes Father. I am trying. Keep me on track here.

So God, will I trust You when you shut me in? Only You know. I am expecting to learn something during my flood that You will call me to. I want to have unwavering faith like Noah did. I want to be righteous in Your eyes so that You will call me to greatness for the sake of Your name and kingdom. I want to obey You and love You with all my heart, soul and strength. Teach me Your ways Lord.

The other interesting thing about that phrase is that it doesn’t say that the Lord shut “them” in. “Them” being everyone else besides Noah. His family, the animals etc…no. God shut Noah in. This was definitely intentional to me for God to be so specific. It’s a constant reminder that God put Noah right where he was supposed to be. God wants me to focus on how Noah’s walk and journey with Him is so specific and thought out. He shut Noah into his destiny. Noah didn’t do it himself. It would be easy for me to focus on how righteous and respected Noah was by God. I could sit here all day long trying to gain that same respect from God. God has spoken to my heart and given me peace about my future and the unknown. I am so much like Peter. I can take that initial step of faith onto the water and believe. But once that water gets rough, I begin to doubt my God. Help me Lord, with my unbelief.

I am thankful for prayer and the ability to ask for the Holy Spirit to enter my time in the word and guide my learning. Thank you God for that privilege.

There is something sweet to knowing that no matter how much work and effort I put into my “ark” God will be the one who sees it through. He will put the finishing touches on my life, on my goals and on my purpose that He has for me. That’s a relief.

Published in: on March 2, 2010 at 12:12 am  Leave a Comment